Ripple in the water of life
by StokesSidle
Summary: I know this sounds like a weird title, i hope you think the story is better, PLEASE READ AND REVIEW! :
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

I don't own anything

(My best friend Amber and I came up with this idea when we were driving to a Mexican restaurant last night. I hope you like it.)

Grissom's POV

I sit here at my desk finishing up some paperwork, so I can go home. I've pulled a double and I am extremely tired.

I have had a lot on my mind and can't seem to concentrate on my work. I glance over at the picture on my desk of my lovely family, my gorgeous wife Sara and beautiful 3 year old daughter Alexis. A smile comes across my face. They are my whole life.

Where would they be without me? Where would I be without them? I think to myself.

Life before my family was becoming very lonesome. I would go home every night to an empty house. I used to dream of what it would be like to be a father, to have a family.

Mine and Sara's relationship evolved into more than just friends after we went out to dinner a few times. I saw a different side of here I've never seen before, that's when I fell in love. Sara was never one to just open up to people, but when she was with me she was like an open book because she knew I was interested.

When Sara and I officially started dating it wasn't long before I realized this was the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. So four years ago I asked her to marry me. She happily agreed. We were married just two months later. Our life was wonderful.

We found out Sara was pregnant six months after we were married. I've always dreamt of being a father but when I found out it was going to happen I was terrified, I wasn't sure if I could do it, if I could be a good father.

Sara had a lot of trouble carrying our daughter. She started having major contractions at five months, so we went to the OBGYN to figure out what was going on. The doctor's told us that Sara's uterus was very weak, and they were afraid that it wasn't going to be able to handle an enlarging fetus, so they placed her on bed-rest.

Sara's uterus finally gave out when she was only seven months pregnant. The doctor's sent her to a specialty hospital in Reno to deliver. Seeing that Reno was six hours away, the hospital called in a helicopter to take us there. As we rode there in the helicopter Sara looked over at me and asked "Gil, is our baby going to be ok?" as a tear ran down her cheek. I wanted to tell her yes, I wanted to tell her everything was going to be ok, but I couldn't because at this point I didn't know. "I sure hope so." I told trying to give her at least a little comfort.

We arrived at Reno's regional medical center, a few minutes later. It wasn't long after that they began to prep Sara for an emergency c-section. I wasn't allowed to go back there since it was an emergency. An hour or so later I began to get very worried. Just about the time I went to find answers to what was happening I was met by the doctor in the hallway. "Mr. Grissom we are sorry that it has taken so long, but we had to go ahead and give your wife a partial hysterectomy." Why? I asked. He told me that her uterus began to set up infection, so they had to remove it. He then showed me to the NICU, where my daughter was. My one pound twelve ounce baby's foot was the length of my pinky. She was so tiny, but still so beautiful. She was in an incubator to help her breath, I just wanted to get her out and hold her, but I couldn't.

Sara woke up twenty minutes after I came into her room. She told me she was fine but she was in a little bit of pain. "How's our baby?" she asked me. Before I could answer her question the doctor came and told us the baby was doing better than expected.

Sara and I lived in a hotel in Reno for a month, until we got to take our daughter home. After lots of tests we finally got to take our little Alexis home.

Now my daughters three and as I sit there watching her play with her dolls and watching my wife read a book it makes me think, what will become of them if something happens to me?

My Alexis, at three, was beginning to show signs of a high IQ, she can state the alphabet front and backwards without missing a letter or even to stop and think. She can tell her address if asked. She even asked me to teach her to read and we have been practicing every night. Sara says when she starts school we should have her IQ checked. Every time my Alexis smiles at me I see the reflection of my child hood. How I lost my father when I was nine, how my mother lost her hearing when I was twelve. How I never really had anything. Some how I hope my daughter has a better childhood than me. I'm going to try my best to make sure she does.

I still can't believe I have cancer. sigh

………….TBC…………….. PLEASE REVIEW tell me if you think I should continue with chapter 2 or leave it.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own CSI or any of its cast!

-This story is still in the point of view of Grissom-

As I stand here at the entrance to my daughter's room, watching her sleep I think of how her life would be without me, would she even remember me when she gets older?

As all these thoughts run through my mind I feel two hands wrap around my waist. It frightens me a little, but then I realize it's only my wife Sara.

"Hey baby what are you doing?" She asked me, her voice barely a whisper.

"Watching our little lady bug sleep." I tell her.

"Well come on honey you need to get to bed you have had a rough day." Sara tells me as she tugs at my arm a little.

I agree and take another look at my daughter sleeping. Then I follow Sara to the bedroom. I slip on my pajamas and get into bed next to Sara.

I turned to face my wife and propped my chin on my hand and began talking to her.

"How did you enjoy your day off?" I asked her as I brush a stray hair out of her face.

"Good, Alexis and I went to play at the park and we also went grocery shopping, but I wish you could have spent the day with us." She tells me as she grabs my hand and entwines our fingers.

I smile at her and kiss her forehead gently, "We'll get to spend more time together, I promise."

"I love you Gil." She tells me as she gave me a kiss.

"I love you too Sara, more than anything." I tell her as I plant a passionate kiss on her lips.

I run my fingers through her hair while we kiss, then I rub them gently down her back.

"Oh Gil." She says almost breathlessly. I moan against her lips, and then began to caress her back with my fingertips once more. She leans her head back and I began to place open mouth kisses down her neck.

"I need you Sara." I say as I kiss her repeatedly down her neck.

In the next few minutes she and I begin to make love. I place myself on top and slowly I enter her. We rock this way several minutes before we both reach our intimate release.

"Oh Sara, I love you so much." I tell her as I lay back down beside her.

She just smiles at me and gives me another kiss on the lips. I get up from the bed and put my clothes back on, she does the same.

As he lay back down and I began to break the news to her about my cancer, I hear, "Daddy, mommy I couldn't sleep" coming from the doorway.

I look towards the doorway and my little Alexis is standing there with her pink blanket her uncle Nicky got her when she was born.

"Come here my little lady bug." I tell her as I make a place for her on the bed between Sara and me.

She runs and jumps on the bed, and crawls between us.

"Did you have a bad dream baby?" Sara asks her as she plays with her hair.

"No, I just woke up and couldn't go back to sleep." Alexis tells her as looks up at her mom.

"Well daddy and I will let you sleep in our bed tonight, but just for one night okay?"

"K, mommy." She says as she scoots down in the bed to get more comfortable. "Night mommy and daddy I love you." She tells us as she closes her eyes.

"Night baby." Sara says as she kisses her forehead.

"Night ladybug." I tell her as rub her gently to get the hair away from her face.

With in a few moments Alexis was asleep. "She is so cute isn't she Gil?" Sara asks me as she looks at our three year old daughter.

"She sure is." I respond.

"Gil, we should have another one."

"Sara, how are we going to do that? You don't have a uterus and there is no way you could carry a child." I ask her a little confused.

"I know Gil but I have been thinking about it, we could use a surrogate mother, because I still have both my ovaries and they could contract the eggs from my ovaries, and place it with your sperm and implant it inside of the surrogate, what do you think Gil?"

I think about this for a moment, it seems like Sara really wants to do this, so I tell her, "If that's what you want to do, I would love to have another one."

She seems so happy about it. "Thank you." She tells me quietly trying not to wake our daughter up.

We fall asleep a few moments later.

The next morning I wake up to the sunshine coming through the window. I roll over to say good morning to my wife and daughter but I to my surprise they weren't there. About the time I start to get up out of bed, I hear footsteps coming up the stairs.

"Hello, daddy Happy daddy's day." My little lady bug tells me, as she comes running in the bedroom with a card for me. It read:

'To Daddy, From Alexis, Happy daddy's day. I love you. Love your little lady bug.'

"Aw thank you Alexis, I love it and daddy is going to sit this on his desk at work so everyone can see it okay?"

Alexis shakes her head in excitement.

At the next moment Sara comes in with a tray for me. "Here you go honey Alexis and I made you breakfast for Father's day." She tells me as she sits the try down in front of me.

It was wonderful, they made blueberry pancakes with maple syrup, a ham and cheese omelet and a bagel; topped off by a small vase with a daisy in it, sitting directly in the middle.

"I picked that flower for you daddy." Alexis tells me as she crawls in the bed next to me. "Thank you babe, it's beautiful just like you."

She just smiles at my compliment.

They both lay in the bed with me as I finish my breakfast. "What do you say daddy spends the whole day with you and mommy?" I ask my little girl.

"Yah! Daddy gonna spend they day with me." Alexis says as she begins to jump on the bed.

"Alexis sit down before you hurt yourself." Sara says as she snaps and points her finger at Alexis.

"Yes mommy." Alexis responds as she sits down quickly.

This makes me smile a little.

...TBC...I know it seems a little weird to end it there, but someone else is helping me with the next chapter! PLEASE REVIEW!!!


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

I want to thank Shortie990 for help with chapter!! Thanks girl:)

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I don't know how I'm suppose to tell Sara that I have cancer, now

that

she wants to have another child. Yah I would like to have one too.

Alexis

deserves to have a little brother or sister to play with. But still

why now?

With everything going on. I know I should have told Sara the moment I

found

out but that day Sara had had a rough day at work and the next day had

not

been much better. Something always seems to come up making me have to

wait

another day to tell her. But let's be honest. I have been stalling,

just a

little.

So here I sit in a over crowded waiting room, reading an out of date

issue of

People waiting for my name to be called. Today me and my doctor disuse

what to

do next.

"GILBERT GRISSOM!" calls a woman at the front of the room.

I discard the old magazine on to the table in front of me and stand up.

I

walk over to where the doctor stands, "Hello Dr. Jenkins again."

"Hello, Gilbert!" replies the Sandy haired women, smiling.

"It's Gil," I speak back.

"I know," she replies and leads me out of the waiting room.

The doctor had told me, that I was to start Chemo treatment a week from

Friday.

Now it is real. I have to tell Sara soon, tonight

...TBC...PLEASE REVIEW!!


	4. Breaking the news

Chapter 4

As I drive home from my doctor's appointment, I try to think of the best way to break the news to my wife.

Tears start to form in my eyes. I just try to think of a good way to tell her.

When I reach my house I notice my daughter outside playing on her swing set, as my wife sits on the porch watching her.

"Hey daddy!" Alexis yells to me as I get out of the Denali.

"Hi lady bug." I call back to her.

I walk up to the porch to take a seat next to Sara. "Hey baby." I say as I kiss her on the lips.

"Hey honey, how was your doctor's appointment?" She asks me as I sit down.

"Good, she said my hearing seems to be improving." I tell her, I couldn't tell her the truth not at this moment.

"I got some good news." Sara said excitingly

"What's that?" I ask as I begin to play with her hair.

"I was talking to my obgyn and she gave me a number to place of surrogate mothers. What do you think?"

"Whatever you want to do baby, if this is something you really want." I tell her as I look into her dark brown eyes.

"Yeah I do, I want Alexis to have a little brother or sister."

I smile in response to her statement. "Sara I need to talk…" I start to tell her but we were interrupted by Alexis.

"Here daddy, I picked you a flower." She tells me as she shoves the flower into my face.

"Thanks lady bug, do you know what kind of flower this is?"

"No not really."

"This is a Gaillardia Pulchella, also known as the blanket flower." My daughter was a little confused about what I was saying. "It is pretty though isn't it."

"Uh huh." She says as she runs back off the porch and back on her swing.

"What was you going to tell me Gil?" Sara asks me as she takes the flower from my hands.

"Nothing, we will talk about it later."

Later that night I stand at the bathroom door watching my wife give my daughter a bath. I smile spreads across my face. After her bath and Sara gets her dress Alexis runs and jumps into my arms.

"Daddy, will you read me a story, so I can go to sleep."

"Of course." I respond as I carry her to her room.

As I sit there with my daughter on my lap, she tells me all about the different animals in her book. I still can't get the news I have to tell Sara off my mind.

Within a few minutes of me reading to Alexis she falls asleep. I lay her down in her bed and gently kiss her on the forehead.

I walk into the living room where my wife lay on the couch reading her romance novel. I take a deep breath as I walk towards her.

"Sara I need to talk to you about something. It's really important."

"Sure honey what is it?" she asks as she sits on the couch to make room for me.

"Sara, honey, I don't know quiet how to tell you this but…" I say as I sigh heavily. "I didn't go to my doctor today for a routine checkup."

Sara just raised an eyebrow and said, "Well why did you go then?"

"I went to her to discuss my treatment I have to start a week from Friday."

"What kind of treatment, Gil?"

I close my eyes I began to tell her, "My chemo treatment, they told me that I have prostate cancer."

Sara's mouth drops open a huge tears begin to form in her eyes. "Oh my gosh Gil, why didn't you tell me about this earlier?"

"Sara I didn't know how to tell you."

This is when Sara burst out crying. I hold her against my chest tightly.

"I love you Gil, and I don't want anything to happen to you, I don't know if I could live without you."

"Everything will be alright, I promise." I tell her. She then cries harder against my chest, that's when a stray tear fell off my cheek and landed on Sara's bare shoulder.

…………….TBC…………..PLEASE REVIEW!!!


	5. ch5

**Author's note: **Hey everyone sorry for not updating my stories for a while, I have been trying to get my final exams over with at school, but finally they are over and you'll be happy to know I made straight A's this semester! Go me! Anyway hope you enjoy the story!!

Chapter 5

As I sat there hugging her tightly I begin to cry even more. She lifts her head up to look me in the eyes.

She doesn't say anything, we just stare at one another for a moment, my eyes still full of tears, before I say, "Baby, we are going to get through this I promise. And I want us to still go through with this surrogate mother thing to okay?"

"How are we going to do that with you going through your treat…" she starts to ask me before I cut her off my placing my finger on her lip.

"Because we want Alexis to have a little brother or sister, and if we don't do it before I get my treatment we won't be able to."

"But…" She starts to say again, before I cut her off once more.

"No 'BUTS' Sara I insist. We are doing this for Alexis."

----The next week----

"Alexis are you ready to go?" Sara asked our daughter as she walks in the direction of her room.

Today is the day Sara and I go to the clinic and they take our offspring and place it into the surrogate we found.

It took us a couple days to choose a surrogate but we finally decided, after interviewing her twice, that Heather would be suitable enough to carry Sara and my child.

"Are you ready to go, lady bug?" I ask her as she runs in the living room and takes a seat next to me on the couch.

"Daddy, why do I have to stay with Aunt Catherine and Uncle Warrick today?"

"Because mommy and daddy are going to the doctor, so we can get you a little brother or sister."

"Am I going to get a little brother or sister today?"

I laugh a little at her question, "No baby it takes about 9 months."

She thought about what I said for a moment before replying "Daddy is 9 months a long time?"

"No, it will go by quickly I promise."

Not long after having this conversation with my daughter were we in the Denali headed towards Catherine and Warrick's house.

I never imagined Catherine and Warrick in a relationship, they are just different; and then about a year ago Eddie was threating to take Catherine to court to gain full custody of Lindsey, as Catherine was going through this emotional time Warrick was a shoulder to lean on. Not long after this all went down did I found they were going out. Two months after dating Warrick asked Catherine for her hand in marriage and she happily agreed.

"We're here!" My daughter said excitingly as we pulled into the driveway of Catherine and Warrick's.

When I parked the Denali, I noticed Warrick and Catherine step out of their front door.

I got out and opened up the back door so I could free my daughter from her booster seat. I lifted her up out of her seat and put on the ground she ran in the direction of were Catherine was standing.

"Hey baby girl." Catherine said as she lifted Alexis up in her arms.

"Catherine you need to be careful." Warrick said as he gave Catherine a strong gaze.

Sara and I just stared at each other for a moment confused, before Sara spoke up, "What are you talking about?"

Catherine and Warrick both looked at each other and smiled.

"Warrick and I just found out we are going to have a baby." Catherine said as she looked at me and Sara.

"Congratulations you too." Sara said as she gave Warrick a hug.

As we were talking, my daughter cut us off, "Aunt Catherine, where is Lindsey?"

"She is in the house, come on lets go find her." Catherine responded as she sat my daughter back down. "Tell mommy and daddy bye." She said as she took my daughter's hand.

"Bye mommy, daddy I love you."

"Bye lady bug, I love you." I tell her as I blow her a kiss.

"Bye baby doll." Sara says as she also blows her a kiss.

I watch my daughter walk off I hear Catherine say "Alexis you look pretty in your sun dress."

"Thank you, my daddy says when I wear this I have to act like a little lady." I smile when I hear this.

Warrick smiles as he watches his future bride walk off with my daughter.

"Are you excited about being a parent?" I ask him

"Yes I'm very excited I can't wait."

"Sorry I didn't mean to disturb your conversation but Gil honey we need to get going or we are going to be late."

"You're right." I tell her after looking at my watch.

"We will see you in a little while." I tell Warrick as I put my sunglasses on and head back to the Denali.

CSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSI

We sat there in the waiting room of the clinic when Sara grabs my hand and silently says, "Are you sure you want to do this?"

"I'm absolutely sure." I tell her ad I flashed her a smile.

"Mr. and Mrs. Grissom?" called a blonde headed woman from the door on the other side of the room.

Sara grabbed my hand and we stood up and approached the woman, that's when I noticed her name tag, it read: Maria.

She placed Sara in a room by herself and she did the same for me. Before I could have time to think I heard a knock at the door.

"Mr. Grissom?" A deep voice came from the other side of the door as it slowly opened.

"Hey Mr. Grissom, I'm doctor Foster." He said as he closed the door behind him and came over to shake my hand.

"Hello." I said in return.

He then began to explain exactly what they were going to do and how they were going to place it in the surrogate.

I then began to tell him about my treatment I was about to undergo and then he told me he would extract enough off spring from me just incase the first attempt of the artificial insemination didn't take for the surrogate. After I heard this I was very relieved.

He then told me they have already scheduled the procedure tomorrow, and that it would take a week to know the results.

The next week I was to start my chemo treatment. The car ride to the oncologist was silent for me and Sara; she held my hand tightly as she looked out of the window. I started to talk until I heard my cell phone ring.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Mr. Grissom, this is Doctor Taylor, how are you?"

"I'm good doctor Taylor, how about you?" As I say this I glance over at Sara, who began to get excited, because she knew what this phone call was about.

"I'm fine Thanks, the reason I called is to let you know about the surrogate mother."

"Any good news?" I ask hoping he would say yes.

"Well Mr. Grissom, we did an ultrasound of Heather, and there is no sign of an embryo, I'm sorry but the procedure didn't take. But no need to give up hope we are going to wait a few days and try again."

"Okay that's fine. Thanks doctor Taylor."

"I'll let you know when we schedule the procedure."

"That will be fine, Thanks again."

"Talk to you soon Mr. Grissom."

"Bye." I say as I hang up the phone.

"Well?" asks an eager Sara.

Before I start to speak I grab her hand, "Sara…" I start as I sigh a little, "The procedure didn't take, they did an ultrasound of Heather and they can't find any sign of the embryo." I tell her and I rub the back of her hand with my thumb.

Out of the corner of my eye I see Sara look down at our entwined hands and then back up at me, when I glance back over at her from looking at the road I can see a tear stream down her cheek.

I pull into the parking lot of the oncologist's office and turn off the engine of the Denali. I turn to Sara that's when I feel my eyes began to form tears. I really wasn't ready for this treatment but I knew I had to be strong for Sara and for my family.

"Sara honey, everything is going to work out, you'll see." I tell her as I take my free hand and wipe away the tear from her cheek.

…………..TBC………….PLEASE REVIEW!!!


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